Keeping Christopher Gavin’s memory alive

Laughter is never far away when you have the pleasure of entering the Gavin's family home in Westport.

Even if the house is now quieter without their beloved son and brother Christopher.

This year will be a year of firsts without him for his loved ones after the 16 year old's very sudden death in Mayo University Hospital at the end of April.

“You never get over it. You just have to learn to live with it and learn to live by trying to do some normal things as best as you can, as close as possible to normality. Laughter is good for the soul,” reflects Michael.

Christopher’s humour and wit are the first things that come to mind for his parents and sister, Emma, and it’s not hard to see where he got it from.

“He'd be the cheeky one, he was good at his one liners,” his mother Karen says smiling.

What would turn out to be his final interaction with his dad was laughter.

“When I left the hospital, he was laughing at me going out the door. We were just watching The Chase on the television, and he thought I was a genius because all the questions suited me. We're having a laugh, and when I got to the door, I said, “I'll be back tomorrow.’”

Their next door neighbour Samantha Pierce, is 'like family' and also nurse on the ward that Christopher was on in MUH.

Samantha woke Michael up at 5am the next morning and told him he needed to get back to the hospital as soon as possible.

“The minute I got up onto the ward, I knew there was something seriously wrong, because they wouldn't let us go near the room.”

The doctor explained that they had been working on Chris for almost an hour, and there was no response. The concern with working for more time was that it would cause irreversible damage.

“So you hear that, and you don't know where to look. You don't know what to do. Your heart is pulled out of your chest.”

“So I said, ‘Can I see him?’ And went down the hallway, and there was a nurse doing CPR, trying to bring him back. I said, ‘Stop.’ There was nothing there. It's a very hard thing to do, to ask doctors and nurses to stop trying to save your son, but that's what we were left with, and it's the worst, it's the worst day of my life. I don't think there could be anything worse.”

“It's just those minutes when you realize that your child has passed away. It's not an easy thing to explain, because it's, it's just brutal. I don't know if there's anything worse than it. If there is, I cannot imagine what it is.”

Sea of Blue

Karen remembers coming home and telling Cathy and Michael that their brother had died.

Christopher is godfather and uncle to Cathy's son Thomas.

Christopher's godson and nephew Thomas with Christopher's sister Cathy

Emma had been due to begin her college exams in Galway that morning and Karen remembers thinking to herself, 'how do you tell someone something like that on the phone?'

Fortunately, her nephew Adam was in Galway and was able to drive Emma and her boyfriend to Castlebar to join the rest of the family.

They will be eternally grateful to Samantha, Terry Ann and Caitlyn and Paddy Walsh.

Before the family even got home from the hospital, Samantha and her sister Terry Ann had sprung into action. From making sure everyone was fed to organising the mass booklets, they helped the Gavins in their time of need.

Michael’s best friend Paddy Walsh was his right hand man throughout. “There was no job that he wouldn't do, no job too big or small”, even clearing all the furniture from the sitting room in preparation for Christopher’s body to come home.

It was all a bit of blur but the funeral director, Adrian McGing, was an expert guiding hand.

The family were blown away with the support of the community.

Karen describes the guards of honour Christopher received from the hospital staff when he left the hospital to go home.

When they got home, the whole estate was out.

When they took Christopher into McGings funeral home, their neighbours in the estate were out again.

Later, coming out of McGings, Rice College had both sides of James Street lined with people down as far as the down as far as the Mall.

The neighbours were lined up outside when the family got home and again when they left their home on Saturday.

There was a sea of blue of Westport GAA team mates and club mates on both sides of Bridge Street.

“It just left us speechless”, Michael says.

Michael can’t praise Westport GAA enough, “they've been brilliant to us. Over the last four months, they've been at any turn, they were there if we needed anything. They went way above and beyond.”

READ MORE: Mayo GAA club pay heartfelt tribute after sad passing of young player

Inseparable

Michael delivered a beautiful eulogy at Christopher’s funeral.

While it was the most difficult thing he ever had to put on paper, he says “I couldn't send him off without saying something about it had to come from me.”

He spoke of how Christopher and his twin brother Michael were inseparable, whether on the pitch or out walking the dog.

“Brothers are brothers, but twins are different. The two lads were the best of mates.”

The parents and sister Emma remember fondly how seriously Christopher took FIFA and how he was a huge fan of style and cars.

As a parent, Michael’s main focus was the wellbeing of Karen and his children and grandson.

“They were my priority before trying to deal with it yourself, but you have to wind it in a small bit for yourself, make sure they're all right, and then you let your own grief out as well, because it's no good holding that in either.”

Keeping Christopher’s memory alive

On Wednesday night in McHale Park, the Westport GAA Minor B team won the Homeland Mayo GAA Minor E Football Championship Final and dedicated the result to Christopher.

The club posted on social media that the final “was more than a game. In victory, our Minor Bs remembered their teammate & friend Christopher Gavin, who left us too soon earlier this year. A night of pride, friendship and remembrance.”

In a poignant photograph, Liam Kilkooley and Daniel Vasiljevs flank Michael, who is holding a Westport GAA jersey, signed by all of Christopher’s teammates.

Christopher, Michael, Liam and Daniel were best friends and would always run out on the pitch together.

The jersey has Christopher’s name on the front, along with the last match he played for the club.

It was one of the many ways the club has rallied around the family since they lost Christopher.

READ MORE: ‘This Mayo picket will go on indefinitely, because we are not for turning’

Karen recalls members of the club coming in the days after Christopher’s death with the jersey, along with printed pictures from the shield final a couple of years before that.

Sean and Pat, the brothers’ coaches, have brought the team all the way through today and are 'mentors for the lads.'

Michael was in Castlebar collecting trophies for a golf society he runs, when he saw a shield on a shelf that caught his eye.

As the saying goes, great minds think alike. Sean had just contacted Karen about organising a memorial shield for Christopher.

Michael ordered the shield that very same day. The plan is that it will go ahead next spring as part of the Paddy Muldoon Cup and will be an annual event.

“It's something to keep his memory alive for his teammates.”