'I would have carried the water bottles' - Cillian O'Connor on Mayo All-Ireland win

Two weeks ago, on October 7, Cillian O’Connor announced his retirement.

The decision to retire from inter-county football didn't come out of the blue, as O’Connor explained on the new RTE Sport podcast ‘Howler’ hosted by former Off The Ball host Ger Gilroy.

The decision to retire from inter-county football was already more or less formed at the start of the season, as O’Connor said:

“Unless something strange happened, it was always the plan. When I stepped away before, I more or less accepted that I was finished, when Andy Moran talked to me to come back. But I had an awareness that a new group was coming through. The last thing you want to do is overstay your welcome. I felt let's put it in and see where we go this year.”

Who could have know, that this would be THE year when Mayo ended the long wait to bring Sam Maguire home. 75 years of heartbreak were wiped out on July 26 when Mayo beat Kerry in the All-Ireland final in Croke Park. It was clear to everyone in the aftermath, around the world actually, what it meant to Mayo people. But over the years as a player, the ones within the squad generally didn’t want to think too much about it:

“We would all know how important it all is to people. But I think everyone is different in the squad, and some of us would prefer to switch and not think about it too much. We never liked to be too caught up in the quest. This journey, this can end up being a distraction. It doesn't really align with your process. I try to focus on the boring stuff during the week. But it was only when we won, it blew us away how much it went to everyone. Sometimes you think this doesn't make sense, it's just a game, just a sport. But then you hear about families and loved ones who are no longer there, connections to Mayo, it was really special.”

Ger Gilroy pointed out, how “the whole sense of emigration ,exile and being driven off the land for being Irish, that sort of all came pouring out in the aftermath as well.

“That's a whole other strand. That definitely was part of the emotion in the celebration. But for us players, we're being told before a match at the weekend, you have to be emotionally regulated, you have to stay at that right pitch. Everybody knows somebody or some family of theirs that's in the UK, that's in Australia, built a life in the US. It's not a Mayo only phenomenon, but it feels for those people, the pride in Mayo clearly goes up. And what's your link to Mayo when you're living abroad 30 years, is the football team. It's a vehicle to connect with people and let them know that you like to spend time with them.”

And when Mayo finally won the All-Ireland this year, the festivities after were something else, O’Connor recalled:

“It was so good, so good. Best way to describe it is, straight after the match it was unbelievable, but at every turn over the next few weeks, you'd remember something, and you'd get excited all over again. I was sitting on the pitch after the match and I asked Paul Durkan, the goalkeeping coach from Donegal: 'This is it, what's ahead of us, Paul? What was the best part of the celebrations for you guys in 2012', and he said 'Definitely the first four months'”, Cillian laughed.

“There were so many highs. One of the best things, on the Friday, few days after the game. Going around the clubs, on an open bus tour, and the club member would get off the bus, we would push them out, close the door, and able to watch that player in his community, hoisting the cup, talking to his friends and family, being mobbed, That was unbelievable. We all knew that guy's story, this year, the last years. That was nearly more enjoyable than your own club.”

The season itself started a typical Mayo rollercoaster. The Roscommon game, that Connacht semi-final that Mayo lost at home in Castlebar. O’Connor described the scene in the dressing room afterwards:

“It was very quite. Very low. We had put a lot of work into it. We didn't expect that. It's one thing to perform and being beaten by a better team on the day. But Roscommon were so much better than us in the second half and we didn't do ourselves justice. We let ourselves down in a few different ways. The dressing room was just very quite initially, we ended up staying there for quite a while, and forced ourselves to talk about it. It was things around questioning ourselves, and that we have tough decisions to make in the next weeks.”

Gilroy asked: “Did you have any belief?”

“The bit of hope was that we didn't perform. We had been training quite well .A lot of stuff we had been working on just didn't come to fruition. Then it's more about exploring, why it didn't happen. If we actually hit these targets, we can win the next game. Secondly, we had seen in the previous season, the game is less predictable now. There are more in-game momentum shifts and within the season as well.”

Manager Andy Moran was very clear afterwards, they got a handle on the defensive end of the game, against Meath, did the players feel that?

“On the defensive stuff, there was an analysis session after the Meath game, that was very clear and very good. We had leaked a lot of goal chances against Meath in the first half. We were nine points down and it could've been more. We showed us, this is the pattern of these defensive lapses. It looked like an easy fix, ok, we're just not wide open here everywhere. It was more of a tactic and mindset thing in defensive positions.

‘I would have carried the water bottles’

When the final day came, O’Connor didn’t make the team. But his mind was set on helping the team as best he could:

“We needed to win this thing. I would've carried a water bottles if it made us a percentage better. It didn't bother me that way. I wanted to play, but I was realistic as well. There were very few periods where I could have actually been in the team. I had a few knocks, setbacks.

But the hardest time was November, December, because I realised this is the role I have to take on. I was healthy but I knew it was going to be difficult for that reason. That's when I had to say, what am I going to do. That was a tough week. I talked to my wife about that. We kind of just said, it's still much better to be in this, be part of this, give it a last crack than leaving now. It was a great decision to stay on.”

Competitiveness never leaves players like O’Connor. But when you made that decision that your role might be different: Did it make it easier?

“Once I made the decision, I'm locking in here, I'm going to be a positive influence, no matter what, it was a bit easier. But to be clear, I was hell-bent on getting onto that team. That was the focus. I wasn't going put on a whistle or a coaching bip or anything like that. Far from it.

“I have played with so many great players, I'd seen when they were injured. And they were as involved, as vocal and as present as if they were playing. And I said it cannot be said that I would let myself down.”

“Everyone bought in. For example, goalkeeper David Clarke one year had a bad hamstring tear for most of the year, his behaviour never changed. Jason Doherty, two cruciates, really bad hamstring tear, and exactly the same. Leading video analysis sessions, sending on clips. Doing his journaling. That is exactly what I need to be.”

About the young fellas, as the rest of the country was enthralled, Kobe has been hyped, Darragh Beirne a bit less so outside of Mayo, but once they hit Croke Park, it was wow.

“They have great attitude. They just love football. There is no issue you could think of, they're just consummate professionals. He was born for professional sports, born for the dressing room. Ice cold all the time. His temperament is his greatest strength.

He doesn't shy away from anything on the field, off the field. Supporters, media, he just goes with the flow. Kobe is a very intelligent guy, he is far more aware of what's happening than people realise.

“I know how much work his dad Ciarán was doing with Kobe since he could put on boots. When Ciarán was our coach, we would always be chatting about Kobe, the different sports he was playing.

But I hadn't seen much of him. We were really curious to see how he was going to settle in. He was the best player in training almst straight away. Darragh Beinre was the same. He just has the cultured left boot of a veteran. It was just like, let's try to get the ball to them – often.”

Asked about where the ability to shoot from distance, almost every angle, and score many goals came from, O’Connor said:

“Not being the tallest, you had to have a quick draw, whereas the bigger, faster players would maybe get an extra second, but that didn't suit them maybe. I had to get it off quickly, or someone would catch up to me or get across and would get blocked. Particularly in the old rules. And i loved watching forwards when I was younger, you grow up watching these famous finishes, different types, Canavan with his left foot off the ground. And who doesn't love shooting practice for goals.”

And O’Connor wasn’t shy to admit, that many of his goals came from close enough range, simply tapping it in:

“I did get a lot of those tap in goals. It was funny, we had absolutely generational players on different parts of the team, and I'd be in awe looking back at some of the stuff they were doing. And you would be embarrassed at the end of the move to tap it in for goal. You'd just be going, that block that Colm Boyle has done, is great, and then at the end of that move, I'd tap it in, and someone would say 'goal for Cillian'. We don't track the other metrics, I know other sports, NFL or basketball do, but the most successful thing for us is the scores.”

When he got called in at 18 for the Mayo senior squad, the first few weeks, Cillian thought 'I definitely shouldn't be here': “I remember exactly where I was sitting, I still sat there at the end, you're with Andy Moran, Alan Dillon, Keith Higgins, Colm Boyle, David Clarke, and I'm looking up to them. If I'd seen them in the street the week before, I would've asked them for autographs. But then after being in the dressing room, getting the the league, and probably due to the way they took me in, I felt part of it after that. And I wasn't afraid of taking responsibility after that.”

‘The two own goal thing is overblown’ - Cillian O’Connor

Thinking of All-Ireland final performances, O'Connor mentioned they 'all kind of blend into one sometimes'. But the drawn game against Dublin in 2016, the two own goals conceded by Mayo, sparked a comment:

“The whole own goal thing is overblown. They got into our small square twice. How the ball actually goes over the line at that stage..”

“I'm not sure,” interrupted Gilroy: “The greatest team of all times needed two own goals to draw with you guys.”

“It wasn't like a back pass to a goalkeeper goes through his legs. They had beaten us. Their ball got into our small square, the ball ricocheted around. There is a chance it comes off or them and goes in. So, I wouldn't even class them as own goals. And one of them, they actually did a really good attacking move, one of the players got a ball over the top, it caught us out.”

And then, there was, unfortunately, that free in the All-Ireland final 2017 against Dublin, where O’Connor hit the post.

“How do you think of the frees that you miss/” Gilroy quizzed him.

“I felt so bad for them. You have your self-talk and routine, visualisation, trying to basically take as many pictures of the goal as you can on your way back so when you look at your hands your gloves, you can almost see the goal in your mind’s eye, and then just try to pick your spot and try draw it in. So, the kick was on the right line but I could this one isn't coming in, it was going straight.

And I was waiting for a little bit of curl and just no curl came, it went dead straight, I didn't wrap my foot enough obviously to generate any curl, it just went straight and hit the post. Andy Moran had just gone off, and he said after 'I'm the biggest goal hanger in the world. If i was still on the field, I had headed that in. And I was like 'ooch, don't tell me that.'. It took ages to get over a miss like that, that's when you lean on support.”

Thankfully to end his Mayo career in style, he was there in Croke Park when it all happened. But, he watched the final minutes from the dressing room -together with his brother Diarmuid:

“I was watching the game with the subs. But I was getting nauseous just watching it, and i hate that feeling. Then I was in the tunnel, pacing around, and then I went into the dressing room, just I don’t know, maybe some anxiety. The game is on the tv, and it's nearly soundproofed, very little noise in there. There might have been five minutes left, then after while Diarmuid came in, and said 'what are you doing here?' And I said the same thing back to him. He just sat down and we watched a few moments seconds of the game. There was something peaceful about it, Just the two of us watching the final moments. It was weid. But then we took off running, it's happening, it's happening. I don't know what we were thinking, but he had the same thoughts as me anyway.”

O’Connor was just back out in time to be part of the ensuing madness:

“It was great watching the bravery of the lads. Carney with that kick down the wing. Ryan O'Donoghue with the composure, cuts back, gives it to Kobe. And then Tommy Conroy with the finish. And you couldn't meet a more diligent professional. He is a machine. I was delighted for him.”

What a way for Cillian O’Connor to sign off on an illustrious Mayo career.