The wonderful present

If you’ve ever found yourself wishing a day or a week would hurry up and be over already, you are not alone. As complex human beings, we can have a pretty strong tendency to always look forward to new bigger and brighter things. Other times we can find ourselves looking back and thinking about past situations, perhaps focusing on things we said or did.
This in itself is not an issue, as it can be useful to look forward to see where you want to go or to to look back to see how far you have come. However, there’s a caveat: In doing this you run the risk of missing out on what is happening in the here and now.
Life often whizzes by at what feels like a speed of 100 miles per hour, and a lot of people have fallen into the habit of viewing their busyness with a sense of pride. However, being present is the one thing you can successfully control (you can’t do anything about the past, and the future hasn’t happened yet!), so looking at how it can be ‘introduced’ to our thoughts is very worthwhile.
In essence, being or living in the present involves becoming aware of what is happening right now. The practice is commonly referred to as being mindful, where you put yourself in control of your experiences. Stepping back from the everyday busyness of your life allows you to notice the feelings and emotions you are currently experiencing, in real time. This recognition allows you to appreciate your experiences in the here and now, rather than on reflection later on or forgetting these experiences entirely.
This outlook is not just a trend; the benefits of being present are supported scientifically. When grounding yourself in the present moment, less emphasis is placed on the things that stress or worry you. Being present in your life can make you happier and healthier. It can lead to better moods and less emotional challenges. It can make you feel energised and create a chance for you to regulate your emotions, which is always a positive thing.
The greatest benefit might be that it arms you with the tools to distinguish between what is really important and what is less important in your life. Eleanor Roosevelt described tomorrow as a mystery and today a gift – she wasn’t far wrong.
If you find your mind wandering while you’re trying to be present, the best way to bring your focus back to the here and now is through a breathing exercise. This can re-centre you and eliminate any distractions.
Popular meditation guides prompt you to notice items in your surroundings that you can see, touch, smell, hear and taste. Bringing your focus to these things firmly positions you in the present moment. Meditation practices, like those found in yoga, are also a great way to teach you to be present.
When trying to be present in your life, think about minimising distractions so your attention does not wane. A very practical way to do this is to turn off phone notifications and try to avoid social media during this time. This creates more room for your own headspace and removes the risk of endless scrolling or getting caught up in other people’s lives.
This is not to say stop spending time in the past and future. By all means continue to do so on occasion, as this is where you can relive your greatest memories and fantasise about your hopes and dreams going forward. That is normal and healthy, and you shouldn’t focus on eliminating this. Rather pop in and out of these forward- and backward-looking thoughts and make sure they take up a relatively short time period, so that they don’t outstay their welcome.
The act of being present is fundamentally a skill, and it needs to be honed over time. The worst thing you could do is overthink it or agonise over whether you are living in the present enough; you’ll only unintentionally defeat the whole purpose of the excercise.
Rather, with a new awareness, start small, maybe by acknowledging the sound of the birds chirping outside or the tastes in your mouth as you eat. It will become more natural over time and make living life a lot more special. And remember, if you are feeling overwhelmed or your thoughts are racing, bringing your attention to your senses is always a strong place to start.

Sadhbh Dunne is a qualified life coach based in Westport. She is the founder of Ember Coaching (embercoaching.ie) and can be reached at sadhbh@embercoaching.ie.