Breaking Dad … and Mam
Diary of a home bird
I fear the roomies are one box set away from setting up a fully functional organised-crime ring.
As I left the homestead a few weeks back to visit my sister and her family in Roscommon for the weekend, the female roomie’s words rang in my ears ‘make sure to get Breaking Bad off them’. Not ‘Give our grandchild a kiss’ or ‘Tell our eldest daughter we were asking for her’. Nope, the message awas make sure to bring back the box set of the final series of ‘Breaking Bad’ which tells the story of Walter White, a chemistry teacher who sets up a crystal meth-amphetamine lab with a former student, Jessie Pinkman.
I was late to the whole ‘Breaking Bad’ craze myself, only becoming addicted to its storyline, like the junkies in the series who get high from Walter’s drugs, a number of months back. I quickly consumed episodes online night after night, arriving into work with swollen eyes, the remnants of a late night fix of Walt and Jessie’s exploits.
When I got home from the weekend spent with my sister, her partner and their seven-week-old daughter, the second question I was hit with by the roomies was, yep, you guessed it, ‘Did you get it?’. I was nearly waiting for money to exchange hands as I handed over ‘the goods’.
The male roomie, who is no stranger to a chemistry set himself (a locum pharmacist) began to mention the series in conversation, proving that he was ‘down with the cool kids’. Phone calls to the brother in Dubai have included, ‘And come here, do ye get Breaking Bad out there?’, not realising that my brother probably has a better range of satellite channels than we do.
I now come home most evenings from work half expecting to see a Colombian drugs cartel sitting around the table and mother explaining innocently ‘Well isn’t it a hobby … It was either this or do a computer course’.
Their most recently consumed box set is the nation’s current favourite ‘Love/Hate’, it formed part of the male roomie’s Christmas present, but only saw the light of day once ‘Breaking Bad’ was done. And boy did they go through it.
As I passed the sitting room most nights on my way to bed I’d hear the nagging shrill voice of Nidge’s other half Trish or the raspy voice of Fran saying ‘coola boola’, which indicated the roomies were immersed in another episode of the gritty crime drama. At the breakfast table the next day, the female roomie would offer her opinion. ‘That Nidge is some fecker’.
I’m concerned that my Godchild will turn into a ‘mini Nidge’. Only two weeks ago, myself and my sister returned from an evening meal and drinks to find the roomies watching the series with baby Saran happy out on the male roomie’s knee, about to find out whether Nidge was the next character to meet a bad end.
So what next for Ballinrobe’s answer to Bonnie and Clyde? Well they’ve already started asking my siblings for suggestions on which box set to tackle next. American political drama ‘House of Cards’ was suggested, but I’d fear pops might seek to have his name put on the ticket ahead of the upcoming local elections.
I have a feeling that episodes of ‘Last of the Summer Wine’ won’t cut the mustard in the Galvin household anymore.
In her fortnightly Diary of a Home Bird column, Ciara Galvin reveals the trials and tribulations of a twenty-something year old still living with her parents.