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Diary of a bored Mayo supporter

Sport
Diary of a bored Mayo supporter


With the FBD League opener off, one die-hard Mayoman told us how he spent last Sunday

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Daniel Carey


9am
“THE FBD is gone,” I said.
Looking back on it now, of course putting it that way was going to frighten the life out of Johnny. He’s more into the farming than the football, is Johnny, and he was sure his insurance company had just gone up in smoke.
If only it WAS the insurance crowd. It’s the second Sunday of the year, I’m crying out for football, and there won’t be a ball kicked in Garrymore. The priest said it at first Mass, so it must be true, but when I heard Mattie whispering “Sure you’d want to be mad to go to a match today”, I’d have boxed the head off him, only I was in a church. For God’s sake, ’twas the middle of August since we’ve seen Mayo play.

11am
Head up to the shop to get the Sunday World and read Spillane. Spot the bucko from the club across the road. Jayzus, he’s so swelled with drink, he actually looks like a can of cider. The word is Johnno asked him in for a trial last month, but you won’t see that man in a pair of boots until May. Right now, he wouldn’t last 20 minutes in Belleek.
Apparently there’s talk of McDonald and Brady coming back. And Pat Fallon was so good for the Over-40s, he has to be worth another look.

2pm
Come back to the house. Leave the car pointed for Garrymore, just in case John Prenty has a change of heart and the game gets the thumbs-up. Try on the Genfitt jersey, as I do every January. “I’ll get another year out of it yet,” I tell the wife. “Yeah, if you can lose three or four stone,” she says.
Stick on Midwest to see if anything is going ahead, but there’s more Abba and Tina Turner than Finno and Billy Fitz. Angelina is looking for suggestions for the Mayo Team of the Decade. I have mine sent in within five minutes – Eugene Lavin in goal. I saw him in town last week and he could still tog out.

4pm
The second ‘Jurassic Park’ is on the telly – with the sound down, ’cause I’m waiting for word on the hurling from Galway. Think the minor hurling league final is on around four – the 2008 version, they’re always a year or two behind down there. I see Jeff Goldblum went back to the island for a second time – to hell with the danger, he says. Tis like meself with the green and red.
Angelina just said Eugene Lavin isn’t eligible because he didn’t play in the decade just gone. What kind of rubbish is that? Sure wasn’t he still the best we ever had?
Just found out the nephew’s wedding is on the same day as the league match in Derry. But the reception is in Clones, so maybe I could shoot up to the match. I’d only be gone four or five hours.

6pm
The young lad just got back from the cinema, raving about ‘Avatar’. Whole load of big lads in blue lepping around, apparently. Sounds like the Breaffy midfield.
Stick on the 1989 NCF video. Jesus, Gabriel Irwin was some goalie. Think he’d be in my Team of the Decade instead.